Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret (my hero from my youth)

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Hudson Taylor was my idol as a young lady and his life of living by faith is an example I need to follow right now as Satan attempts to take over my mind and steal my peace. The main reason I fell so deeply in love with Brent Spiner is because Brent reminds me of Hudson Taylor more than any other man in my life. As a young lady, I wanted to marry a man who had the heart of Hudson Taylor. I have found him in Brent Spiner. Now I need to ensure I remain worthy of Brent by honoring my Lord, obeying his Gail Commandments to me and staying strong in my faith (like Hudson did most of his life).

UPDATE: Getting lots of insight into how Hudson Taylor and George Muller managed their finances. They were very creative in ways to save money and they are inspiring me to do the same. I post this, not to solicit for money, but to share how God provides for us if we have the spirit of waiting on Him and asking Him for wisdom. Jesus told me in 2015 not to spend money on beauticians. I was aghast and said, “What do I do about my hair?” Jesus answered, “How do missionaries cut their hair?” I then decided to buy me some cheap beautician shears for about $12 and learned how to cut my own hair. I also bought a cape to put around me when I cut, so I don’t get hair all over me and some spray bottles (that I also use for my laundry). I also use some razors that I bought. To my amazement, I now cut my own hair better than any beautician could! Because I do it myself, I can give myself cuts more frequently and I look like I spend a lot of money on my hair.

BOTTOM LINE: I’m staying at this apartment because it seems to me staying here will enable me better to do the Gail Commandments. I’m a little concerned over whether I can save $100 a month now that my rent’s gone up and then I just shoot a prayer at Jesus and say, “Well Jesus, I’m more worried about your reputation than I am my needs or my money. That’s why I’m staying here. Now, I’ve done my best. It’s your job to make sure I can do the Gail Commandments. I’m giving you a chance to SHOW OFF! Show the world, through me, that when you tell your child to do something, you will find a way to make it possible to obey you.”

Hudson, like me, gets frustrated, when he has to pay more for something just cuz people are used to a higher standard of living and won’t charge less for services, like rent. He gets frustrated when other people’s desire for a more luxurious lifestyle impacts him, forcing him to pay for their luxuries because they don’t know how to live frugally. Like his missionary community expected a certain standard of living in China and Hudson was forced to pay higher rent for more luxurious accommodations than he really wanted cuz that’s what all the other missionaries were doing and cuz nothing else was available that he could use. It put him in a financial bind. But he learned to turn it over to the Lord.

It goes without saying that I NEVER EAT OUT. I only eat out when my friends or family take me out to eat.

So I’ve been praying to God about my $75 rent increase, which is no surprise to Jesus. I’ve been asking Him, is there any place where I can cut expenses? So I cancelled my Accident and Critical Care Insurance (not the exact same thing as health insurance), which I don’t think I’ll ever end up needing. That saves me about $17 a month. I can’t go any lower on auto insurance, the electric bill or my Internet bill. Phone and cable are free. I have a very basic phone. I’ve never had a phone that allows me to do the Internet or any fancy stuff. That is fine with me. I’m not big into texting. Now that I don’t watch cable T.V. that much, it doesn’t really matter. I’ve cut back on television viewing to give myself more time to write and to not get caught up in the news, which distracts me from my writing. I know Jesus wants me to have the Internet because how else can I obey the Gail Commandments and post a YouTube video every week without the Internet? So that stays.

My Amazon Kindle saves me money on books and I won’t be buying anymore books for now. I’ve used up my Christmas money on that to help with research for my Silver Skies novels in progress. I do not pay extra for WiFi with my Spectrum Internet. I bought a D-Link system at Office Depot a couple years ago (about forty bucks) and use that for WiFi. I did it all myself.

I pay about $96 a year for WordPress website services. I won’t cancel my website because it’s an important way for me to communicate with my followers. My writing income is practically nothing, so I mainly do that as a passion and as my ministry for Jesus. I consider myself a missionary writer. You might say, but if you write better than the pros, you should be able to live off your writing. Not when the most powerful organization in the world (the Jesuit Order) opposes you as a writer. Jesus has shown me how to work around them and get published and be able to eat. To give you an idea of their power, they are behind the censorship happening right now in social media and the mainstream news. I believe Jesus raised up Jeff Bezos and Amazon just for me, so I’d be able to publish for FREE. Jeff went to my high school.

When I feel my book is ready, I publish it all myself and do it all for FREE. I’ve learned how to use Amazon’s system to do it all for free. I design my own covers, set up the manuscript for Kindle and paperback and off it goes. I even do my own audio books for free using my Logitech webcam as my microphone and a free program called Audacity. I use some pantyhose inside a headband as my filter when I speak into the microphone. You might say, how’d you figure out how to do it all? Trial and error and using my brain and researching online. However, I have set very high standards for my work in progress, and I’m determined that though I do it all for free, the reader, when they buy the book, they won’t notice the difference between my book and one published by a fancy publisher. I set very high standards for myself and this book won’t go to the press until it’s BETTER than the books published by mainstream publishers! To me, everything out there seems canned, like it all has the same voice. Authors are too afraid to stand out and have their own voice! You know, our modern 21st century world is so materialistic. Everybody thinks you have to spend money to make it in anything and people end up trusting their pocketbook more than the Lord. Gone are the days of Christians like George Muller and Hudson Taylor, who truly trusted the Lord for their life and finances. I think part of the blame goes to social media, that bombards us with ads day in and day out on spending money! Also, people are too afraid of being different and being “poor” is considered a social calamity. Well, George Muller was “poor” but the Lord provided for him and he can do it for me!

Actually, the Gail Commandments makes decision making easy for me. Jesus said to spend money only on food and bills, so that rules out a move. To move, I’d have to spend money on other than food and bills, because I’d have to spend money on the move. Therefore, I’ve concluded that when it’s time for me to move, my men will cover ALL THE COSTS. They haven’t contacted me about moving. Though I’m giving them until March 29, 2019 to let me know if they want me to move. I have not heard from them since mid-January. If I don’t hear from them by the 29th, I will renew my apartment lease for a year, even though it has increased $75 a month. Not sure of the reasons for their silence, but I have no doubt that Brent would die for me, if he had to. I always give him space when he needs it.

The big challenge for me is to figure out how to save $100 a month (a Gail Commandment). So I reason, well Jesus would not give me this commandment, without making a way to do it. I’m going to focus on cutting expenses everywhere, and see what Jesus comes up with to allow me to obey this Commandment.

This morning Jesus showed me a way that I should only have to grocery shop once a month. I can make my Great Value brand frozen strawberries to last a month, if I eat less of them at bedtime (my favorite food practically), and instead of GV frozen vegetables every night at bedtime, I’ll alternate with a can of mixed vegetables on one night and frozen vegetables on another night.

I eat very little meat, mainly to save money, but also to watch my calories. But Jesus once said a little bit of red meat is good for me. I eat a lot of eggs to compensate for cutting back on meat, fish and chicken. I eat Eggland’s Best eggs, which is a little more expensive than buying the Great Value brand (about six dollars difference a month). I think I’ll buy the Great Value brand from now on and get the big 60 eggs carton, if it’s available (this should last me a month). For chicken, I buy a 6 lb. bag of frozen breasts about once a month. For red meat, I buy 93% ground beef about 2.5 pounds a month. For fish, I buy canned pink salmon (Great Value brand), about 4 cans a month. I have increased my nuts (another of my “sinful” pleasures). I order nuts in bulk to save money. Nuts are the only area where I’m buying some organic and this is cuz that’s all that’s available. I buy organic flax oil about once every two months, cuz organic tastes so much better in flax oil. Nuts also helps me since I’m semi-vegetarian. But I do limit how much I eat of the nuts, so I don’t end up looking like a blimp. But I eat more nuts than the average person does. I eat pumpkin seeds, ground flax seeds, dry roasted peanuts, chia seeds and pumpkin seeds in the shell in combination with my dry cereal (Cheerios) and rice chex. I buy Great Value brand in Cheerios now, to save money. Because nuts are expensive, I order online and buy in bulk. I always get the Great Value brand if available. I do Great Value brand on everything, if I can. It saves me money.

Any ways, by cutting back on my frozen strawberries and only having a small amount at bedtime, increasing my canned vegetables and decreasing frozen vegetables (alternating frozen vegetables one night and canned another night), and buying Great Value brand eggs in place of Eggland’s Best, I may be able to cut my grocery bill a bit every month and make it so that I only need to shop at the grocery store once a month (excluding what I order in bulk online). This will help save money and time. Jesus will work it out.

I like to have two servings of fruit a day: a granny smith apple and strawberries at bedtime. Since I only want to shop once a month, I will buy Walmart brand peaches and pears in their own juice (canned) to tide me over when I run out of apples. I find that if I buy a pack of romaine lettuce, and wash and dry the lettuce and store it in paper towels and a zip lock bag, my lettuce will last me for about 2.5 to 3 weeks. Celery lasts a long time if I dry the celery and store in in paper towels and aluminum foil. I buy enough tomatoes to last 3 weeks (about 6 tomatoes). A 2 lb. bag of carrots last me all month and I store them in bubble wrap in the produce part of my frig when they start looking old. If I need to shop more than once a month, I may just pick up another bag of lettuce, OR I may substitute wakame salad in place of lettuce salad for about a week out of every month. I make the wakame salad from dried seaweed that I reconstitute. I’ve learned you save money, when you make sure to preserve your food and use it all. I try not to waste food. That is key to living on a limited budget.

I can’t stoop to drinking sink water. It tastes yucky. I buy Great Value brand spring water, or Publix spring water in gallon jugs at the store. I do use sink water to boil my rice noodles. But I cook my rice/quinoa with bottled water in the pressure cooker (about every 4 days). I had a reverse osmosis water purifier at one time, but it was such a pain to have to get a plumber to install it, that I no longer use it. Besides, it no longer works. The water in my town is fluoridated, which I HATE. So I just buy bottled water. I hear water filtration systems don’t take out fluoride any ways.

My meat consumption is low, but I do eat some meat mainly to eat a balanced diet (one of the Gail Commandments).

I do spend some money on Asian food. I find my body seems to need seaweed. Perhaps it’s the magnesium. I was also raised on this food. Jesus understands that I was raised on Asian food and I’m sure does not have a problem with me eating Asian. I eat a wakame salad dish, using rice vinegar and chia seeds that is so delicious. I get most of my Asian food from Amazon and Walmart now. I order kombu and wakame in bulk to save money (this will last me for months). In place of sake (very expensive), I use sherry cooking wine in combination with mirin for my cabbage/chicken breast stir fry dish. I buy shiitake mushrooms in bulk (to save money) and rehydrate them for the cabbage stir fry dish. I make an Asian dish comprised of red beans, brown rice, quinoa, kombu seaweed in my pressure cooker and eat this every day. The quinoa is very healthy and helps to offset the fact that I eat very little meat. Organic Great Value quinoa is all that’s available for cheap, so I buy organic here. I top this with a teaspoon of fresh flax oil. Yummy! I’m sure Jesus does not mind that I eat what (to me) is delicious food. By eating a cheap Asian style diet, I don’t feel deprived, I eat a balanced diet and I save a bit of money, because Asians don’t eat a lot of meat.


This is a delicious and healthy way to eat quinoa! My own personal recipe. I do a lot of this. Been cooking for a loooong time.


2 cups organic brown rice with quinoa (1 C rice with 1 C quinoa), washed (need a strainer to do this)
one piece of dried kelp, cut into squares
1 cup azuki beans (organic preferred), washed and soaked 6 to 8 hours
4 1/2 cups spring water, including water used to soak azuki beans
small pinch of sea salt
organic flax oil (1 tsp.)

Drain the water from the soaked azuki beans and set aside. Place the beans, kelp, and brown rice with quinoa in a pressure cooker. Add the water used to soak the beans plus fresh water, according to the amount suggested above. Mix the brown rice, quinoa, kelp, and beans. Place the uncovered pressure cooker over a low heat until the water just begins to boil. Add the sea salt, cover, and turn the heat to high. Reduce heat to medium low when the pressure is up. Heat at medium low for 35 to 40 minutes. Remove from heat, allow the pressure to come down, and remove the cover. Allow the rice, beans and quinoa to sit for 4 to 5 minutes before serving. Add about 1 tsp. of organic flax oil (shake the bottle well first or stir it with a stick) on top of your dish and a bit of sea salt for flavoring, mix together. Yummy. You NEVER cook flax oil. Always add it FRESH from the bottle.


Looks like I can cut grocery costs by buying Great Value brand eggs (the large carton) and cutting back on my frozen strawberries and vegetables and increasing my canned vegetables (in place of the frozen on some nights). With this strategy, I should only have to shop at Walmart once a month at the store. I also like this cuz the days I go grocery shopping, I never get any work done on my writing. Between shopping, bringing in the groceries up flights of stairs and doing my Excel budget to ensure I stay within budget, the whole day goes to the grocery store. I do order a lot of foods online to be able to buy in bulk and save money. Any ways, by making a simple adjustment of ordering Great Value brand eggs over Eggland’s Best and increasing my canned food consumption and decreasing my strawberry consumption, I can save at least thirty dollars a month in groceries.

I surrendered to go to the mission field as a young lady, and even though I pose for Playboy, my motive for doing so is to honor my Lord, by showing the world that Jesus is not a cock blocker. In fact, it was Jesus who encouraged me to do so, but did not order me. On the advice of my men, I only allow those who pay for the pictures to see them. I figure if they pay for it, they will probably be responsible with what they do with them. Jesus is not a cock blocker.

On the other hand, though I have a marriage list, I prefer monogamy, but allow for the list, because many worthy men have striven to support Brent and I and we take on the forces of hell in Satan’s Jesuit Order (currently led by Loree McBride). Jesus does not mind me giving these brave men my love and support. But they need to understand that I desire emotional intimacy above casual sex and really do prefer monogamy. The idea of making love to a bunch of men, like 10,000 is NOT my cup of tea, even if they are all famous and handsome. Actually, fame means nothing to me. I am an INFP and also a devoted Christian. We INFPs do not desire casual flings in our sexual encounters. We desire a deep, intimate relationship and I never want to come together sexually with any man unless we have established a spiritual and emotional bond first.

Hudson broke a lot of the conventions of his time, but he always maintained a life of faith and trusted God to take care of his needs, as long as He followed God’s will for his life. He is an example that I need to follow at this time.

Jesus calls me His favorite. I do not feel worthy to be called this. But I do strive to do God’s will and this has been a concern of mine all my Christian life from Sept. 19, 1971 to now.

My faith has been sorely tested many times. I prayed every day as a young lady that I would only marry in God’s will and asked God to break up any relationship that was not His will and He led me to marry a Jesuit, who was very rigid and who was a secret homosexual having sex with boys. Later, Jesus led me to divorce this person. He also brought Brent Spiner into my life in 1990, while I was married. Looking back, I can see how he used my sociopath husband to cure my rigidity and legalism as a Christian. I was pretty deep into legalism and, unfortunately, Jesus probably needed to put me into that marriage to fix this.

Usually, when my life seems to be chaos and my circumstances seem to be in a flux or “dangerous” or uncertain, I’m about to enter a new passage in my life. Satan takes advantage of these vulnerable times to try and get me off my path. During these times Satan tempts me to doubt and to make decisions based on fear and doubt and not on faith. I ask you all to pray that I won’t let my Lord down at this time, when it appears my expenses exceed my income. Even though, in the past Jesus has miraculously provided, sometimes my faith is weak. Satan works overtime on me and causes all sorts of problems. I am determined to continue the Gail Commandments. No decision is easy for me, because my foe is the Jesuit Order, run by Satan himself, and the Jesuit Order is easily the most powerful organization on earth at this time. Only Jesus Himself himself can overcome them.

Right now I desire more than anything to finish my Silver Skies novels, which I feel will end up masterpieces of literature that Jesus can use to lead people (most especially the Jewish nation) to Him. I feel in my guts that my writings and testimony will be a powerful tool that God can use to lead tribulation saints to Him. I am currently studying the fiction writing craft and striving to write a novel that will have the literary quality of Tolkien, and the spiritual power of the Bible. It’s quite an ambitious undertaking, but, it appears, I may succeed if I don’t allow Satan to sidetrack me. Satan is working overtime on me. I am hit from every angle with attacks of all sorts. Right now, he’s attacking my finances and trying to get me into a fear/doubt mode. If my hunches are correct that my writings will end up a super masterpiece used by God on tribulation saints, this may explain why Satan attacks me so much and why I always feel like I’m under siege. I appreciate prayers from believers for me and my men. We are literally taking on Satan himself and he’s obsessed with us with a ferocity that would take down the average Christian. Jesus has literally had to show up to help us, but sometimes the attacks become so overwhelming and our faith is sorely tried. When this happens, I strive to learn from good examples.

Satan tries to get me off balance, to lose my focus, to disobey the Gail Commandments or to lose myself in the current political debates (which Jesus says won’t make any difference for the tribulation).